Darkeness retreat

In previous posts I have mentioned that I enjoy adventure. A few months ago I went on an inner adventure. I have often read that if one goes into darkness, it raises the melatonin level which helps to open the third eye. In fact the Kogi, an indigenous tribe from northern Columbia, who have visited our farm many times, use this method to raise their future shamans or mamos. When a Kogi child is born, the mamos will visit the family and child. If the child is to be a future Mamo, the child is raised in a cave for nine years, sometimes longer and receives a special education.

I had thought of going to Thailand where Mantak Chia has a retreat center and also offers a darkness retreat. Lo and behold, we have a similar facility just outside Vilcabamba.

I signed up for five days of darkness. No internet, no light to read by, nothing but yourself. Giving up five days is a sacrifice in itself. I have included some pictures of the place, but remember it is pitch black the whole time.

When I arrived there, Nicholas, the owner, explained the procedure and I was able to practice with the window open for light. The room is circular, about eight paces across with two alcoves, one for the bed and one for the bathroom. The bathroom has a great hottub. You have to walk around with your arms up, so that you don’t bang into the wall and hurt yourself. Breakfast and dinner are served. The server rings a bell when the food arrives. I had a little bell that I had to ring. This was just to let them know that I was OK. You know when it is morning because you can faintly hear the birds, likewise at night everything is quiet.

What I found was that I had to be really disciplined. I had my meditations and exercises to do and once a day I had a lovely hot tub soak. There are only so many hours that you can sleep. On the whole I was not too bored.

I was hoping my third eye would open. Maybe I would see elemental beings. Who knows what. I have done ayahasca, where you see the etheric world. It is very colorful and translucent, full of movement, like a rainbow. Also sometimes when I have a deep meditation, it's like looking through a kaleidoscope, moving patterns appear,mainly in golds, blues, purples and indigo.

On the second afternoon the room lit up. I couldn’t find the source of light. I realized that it was an inner light. As I looked around, a tower from a gothic cathedral formed all around me. It had no relation to the room I was sitting in. However it was rather lifeless with a lot of concrete instead of beautiful stone. I was disappointed and complained to spirit that there was no life. No beautiful colors. No movement. There were benches and a table on the floor. They seemed so real. I had to walk around the table (in my imagination) and put my hand on it, to steady myself. Yet my hand went right through the table.

There were other scenes. One time I was sitting on a ledge with a wall behind me. I could walk right through the spiritual wall, yet I banged into the real wall, two feet behind. Luckily my arms were up and I did not hurt myself.

On the last evening I had a beautiful experience. Images appeared in front of me. They were images you see from Indian/Sanskrit art. Elephants and beautiful palm trees. At first it was a bit chaotic, but I asked it to calm down. Images came and went, a bit like looking through the kaleidoscope. Then behind the palm trees the stars appeared in a black,black night sky. Slowly revolving around.Millions of them. Even when I looked up,they were there. Everything was beautiful, so peaceful and quiet. Eventually I was tired, lay down and fell asleep with the stars still moving overhead.

I am not sure what all this meant. From my readings of Rudolf Steiner I did get some glimpses. Rudolf Steiner talks about the abyss we have to cross, between the physical world and the spiritual world. I felt that perhaps I had crossed the abyss prematurely. For this reason I did not experience the life that I expected. Although,on the last night I started to have a moving, beautiful experience of the infinity of the universe.

Would I repeat it? At this stage no. I would have to give at least ten days. That would be hard. It would take so much willpower to overcome the boredom. Plus I am not sure how valid this experience is for my spiritual journey. I am glad that I did it. It was fascinating. I learned so much about myself and the journey to the other side.

I have included some pictures of the site.